Your replies to the question at the bottom of this post will determine whether this series of stories continues.First, here are the stories:
A Pet Rock Hotline Day
Taco Tuesday
Sigma
Eavesdropping
A Weird Book
A messed up day...and stupid Facebook games
Depressed
A strange CD
RASUKI
Training
Disk 2
Sexual Harassment
Odd little meeting
Out of sight...
Kwacebs and Ponai
lets-all-call-at-same-time
Hairy women
The weekend
Private Freak Show
Sightings
"Dogos"
Project work
Mad House
Trifles
I feel violated
on the threshold
back-on-terra-firma
back-to-grind
such a waste
slime
clothes
zufa
mens-skirts
at the station
second-day-back
space-station-tour
going-in-space
uniform
management-party
jupiter-call-center
minda
Tarjay
alien-routine
stupid-call-center
alien-religion
ass-kissers
crisis-of-faith
credit-card-suck
the conflict-begins
http://akktri.livejournal.com/660724.html
religious-spat
isolation
Registry suck
uryanzor
friday-at-the space-station
fruit-juice
drunk-out-of-my-mind
stranded
reprieve
coming home
back-to-earth
And finally this:
2009/10/ update
What do you think will happen next? Any questions or comments?
Showing posts with label science fiction. Show all posts
Showing posts with label science fiction. Show all posts
Friday, October 2, 2009
Update
I've just contacted Sigma on my computer. She's doing all right. She's still a Christian and she's checking to see what she can do about my paycheck. She also asked me to come to her planet, or maybe go back to the station.
What should I do? Any and all comments would be appreciated.
If no one says anything, I don't think I'm going to post any more stories like this.
What should I do? Any and all comments would be appreciated.
If no one says anything, I don't think I'm going to post any more stories like this.
Back to earth
I was relieved to be finally going home. It had taken far too long, but now I was actually going. I slept through the first leg of the trip, waking up just as a small blue dot appeared on the monitors in the cockpit. I had breakfast and then Sigma showed me her planet's social networking "site". That's not the right word for it, but it's kind of like what it is, except with video phones and some crazy stuff earth people haven't invented yet. Anyways, I registered an account and tried it out, which was interesting. Sigma told me Minda was on there, but I wasn't sure if I wanted to break her heart again. I eventually decided to add her, but I didn't wait for a reply. I watched a movie from Sigma's planet, a drama about a couple separated by a long distance in space and a child they lost due to being mauled by a Cuizlu. It was sad and made me feel depressed about leaving Minda. I watched cable to lighten the mood.
By then I felt gravity tugging on me and decided we were nearing the surface of the earth. I played one of their computer games, then naped in a sofa until Sigma shook me and said we were back.
Once she had the hatch open, I quickly hurried outside, looking for my suitcase.
It was lying open in the field. Things were slightly dirty. It contained bits of weeds and had bugs crawling in it, but nothing was missing. I was able to rescue a shirt from a nearby bush. The rest of it was tucked safely inside. Everything was there except the food and what Sigma took.
I asked Sigma for my things and she returned the confiscated items, and my car keys, and my wallet (no money was missing, thankfully, but it still smelled funny). I hurried to my car (which luckily hadn't been towed away) and hurried home.
The moment I got in the door, my dad and brother and mom asked me a lot of questions about what happened, so I had to make something up. Well, I'd formulated a story to tell them while coming home, so I basically told them that one, as quickly as I could. It was a good thing they were watching a movie and didn't stop to think about it. So now they think I went to a conference and did nothing but have a lot of long, boring seminars and work in their call center. That's good enough.
I didn't mention this before, because nobody would understand the situation until I explained my story, but on Friday of that first week back I got my paycheck and it was only $600, just like I had only worked 40 hours. I asked Sigma if it would show up in the next paycheck and she said no, she had an account on planet Pathilon that contains the rest. I told her I couldn't use that and it's probably void after 90 days or something anyway. But she said it wasn't legal to give me that in earth currency without it being taxed, and I'd already paid the taxes once, the taxes for her planet. I asked if it counted in insurance or something and she said no. That was frustrating. I asked her if she could bypass the law for just one paycheck, like calling it a "gift" or something, and she said she'd think about it. And we didn't talk about it again that day.
When I came back the following Monday, she was gone. And she stayed gone the entire week. So now it's been, what, two weeks? Three? Anyways, it's been awhile since my little adventure. I still haven't seen Sigma. I hope she's doing all right. I haven't seen my money, either, but I'm not sure how to prosecute something like this. I still think about my time on the station, and wonder if they still believe in Jesus and if their souls are at peace.
By then I felt gravity tugging on me and decided we were nearing the surface of the earth. I played one of their computer games, then naped in a sofa until Sigma shook me and said we were back.
Once she had the hatch open, I quickly hurried outside, looking for my suitcase.
It was lying open in the field. Things were slightly dirty. It contained bits of weeds and had bugs crawling in it, but nothing was missing. I was able to rescue a shirt from a nearby bush. The rest of it was tucked safely inside. Everything was there except the food and what Sigma took.
I asked Sigma for my things and she returned the confiscated items, and my car keys, and my wallet (no money was missing, thankfully, but it still smelled funny). I hurried to my car (which luckily hadn't been towed away) and hurried home.
The moment I got in the door, my dad and brother and mom asked me a lot of questions about what happened, so I had to make something up. Well, I'd formulated a story to tell them while coming home, so I basically told them that one, as quickly as I could. It was a good thing they were watching a movie and didn't stop to think about it. So now they think I went to a conference and did nothing but have a lot of long, boring seminars and work in their call center. That's good enough.
I didn't mention this before, because nobody would understand the situation until I explained my story, but on Friday of that first week back I got my paycheck and it was only $600, just like I had only worked 40 hours. I asked Sigma if it would show up in the next paycheck and she said no, she had an account on planet Pathilon that contains the rest. I told her I couldn't use that and it's probably void after 90 days or something anyway. But she said it wasn't legal to give me that in earth currency without it being taxed, and I'd already paid the taxes once, the taxes for her planet. I asked if it counted in insurance or something and she said no. That was frustrating. I asked her if she could bypass the law for just one paycheck, like calling it a "gift" or something, and she said she'd think about it. And we didn't talk about it again that day.
When I came back the following Monday, she was gone. And she stayed gone the entire week. So now it's been, what, two weeks? Three? Anyways, it's been awhile since my little adventure. I still haven't seen Sigma. I hope she's doing all right. I haven't seen my money, either, but I'm not sure how to prosecute something like this. I still think about my time on the station, and wonder if they still believe in Jesus and if their souls are at peace.
Coming Home
When I was told to get ready to go, Sigma didn't have to tell me twice. Since I was already in my jeans and t-shirt, I hurried down the hallway with her, at which point she starts talking to this lady with blonde hair and purple fur and tan skin. This was the Mekhilta I'd heard about. We introduced ourselves. After that, I made my way to the spaceship.
As I was going through the airlock, I heard Minda calling me, telling me to wait. I turned around and waited. She came close and told me that she loved me and would miss me and then she's hugging me so tight with her arms and tail that it knocks the air out of me. Then she kisses me on the mouth. I quickly pulled away and said bye, not knowing what else to say. I wasn't sure I wanted to promise anything. I told her that Jesus loved her and waved goodbye and got on the ship.
As I was going through the airlock, I heard Minda calling me, telling me to wait. I turned around and waited. She came close and told me that she loved me and would miss me and then she's hugging me so tight with her arms and tail that it knocks the air out of me. Then she kisses me on the mouth. I quickly pulled away and said bye, not knowing what else to say. I wasn't sure I wanted to promise anything. I told her that Jesus loved her and waved goodbye and got on the ship.
Reprieve
Tuesday.
We were still stuck at the station. Nobody had brought the ship back yet. I wasn't happy about that, or having to work every day of the week. I grudgingly went about my work, biding my time.
I had this one guy call about a problem he had with a retailer. It was one of those dumb situations where the guy wanted to complain to a supervisor because he couldn't get away with violating company policy. I offered to send him to corporate but he said they wouldn't listen. His voice sounded funny and I couldn't help smiling a little too much. Before I could shut off the picture, he really got mad and kept demanding a supervisor. The problem was, the escalation line was busy and my two crewmates were busy. So he just waited and waited and then he insulted me and made fun of my looks and made comments about one of the stories circulating about me. I just put up with it because it was my job. He wouldn't let me put him on hold or anything. Eventually I got Sigma to take the call.
The other calls went more smoothly, though more people were asking strange questions about me getting drunk on something called Vefrek. I wondered how they knew that but didn't ask them.
I went to lunch and asked Minda about it. Her response was "I don't know, maybe Sigma said something." And then she looked sad. I asked her why she looked glum and she said "You're leaving." I sighed and said yes. I told her I was tired of the station and wanted to go home and she could come visit me if she wanted. She just sighed and said nothing. I told her it was good we hadn't done anything beyond what we did or it would have been worse for her. That made her nod. Then she just stared at the table. I thought about doing something to comfort her, but I figured that probably would have made the parting worse.
I took some more calls. Another crisis about scientific instrumentation on a Liobvalx cruiser. And stupid account system problems. Just the usual stuff, nothing memorable. The architecture of the spaceships and dwellings was pretty uniform and uninteresting for the most part. The novelty had passed the first couple days I'd taken calls. And those calls weren't any different. I logged out for the day and went to the break room to watch cable.
About a half hour later, Minda comes into the room, looking like she'd been crying or something. I didn't know what to say. She sat down next to me on the couch, wrapping her arms and tail around me, so I put my arm around her. She tries to kiss me, but I push her back and tell her no, explaining the biblical stance on marriage. She said that wasn't what I was saying that night we were kissing, but again I said I was drunk.
Then she asks me, "Is it worth marrying someone if your partner is of a different species and you don't know if their sexual equipment is compatible?" It wasn't a very subtle question, so I said if she's talking about an Abreya, then yes. Until I knew for certain, the marriage would be a valid thing. If it really was impossible, the two could just go their separate ways, but all that means is that their wedding shouldn't be a huge spectacle. She sadly nods and we just cuddle.
I have another study session with her, do some exercises, and prepare for bed.
When I was heading down to the crew quarters to sleep, I heard a shout. I went out to investigate, and Sigma was telling me to get ready to go and that the ship was here.
We were still stuck at the station. Nobody had brought the ship back yet. I wasn't happy about that, or having to work every day of the week. I grudgingly went about my work, biding my time.
I had this one guy call about a problem he had with a retailer. It was one of those dumb situations where the guy wanted to complain to a supervisor because he couldn't get away with violating company policy. I offered to send him to corporate but he said they wouldn't listen. His voice sounded funny and I couldn't help smiling a little too much. Before I could shut off the picture, he really got mad and kept demanding a supervisor. The problem was, the escalation line was busy and my two crewmates were busy. So he just waited and waited and then he insulted me and made fun of my looks and made comments about one of the stories circulating about me. I just put up with it because it was my job. He wouldn't let me put him on hold or anything. Eventually I got Sigma to take the call.
The other calls went more smoothly, though more people were asking strange questions about me getting drunk on something called Vefrek. I wondered how they knew that but didn't ask them.
I went to lunch and asked Minda about it. Her response was "I don't know, maybe Sigma said something." And then she looked sad. I asked her why she looked glum and she said "You're leaving." I sighed and said yes. I told her I was tired of the station and wanted to go home and she could come visit me if she wanted. She just sighed and said nothing. I told her it was good we hadn't done anything beyond what we did or it would have been worse for her. That made her nod. Then she just stared at the table. I thought about doing something to comfort her, but I figured that probably would have made the parting worse.
I took some more calls. Another crisis about scientific instrumentation on a Liobvalx cruiser. And stupid account system problems. Just the usual stuff, nothing memorable. The architecture of the spaceships and dwellings was pretty uniform and uninteresting for the most part. The novelty had passed the first couple days I'd taken calls. And those calls weren't any different. I logged out for the day and went to the break room to watch cable.
About a half hour later, Minda comes into the room, looking like she'd been crying or something. I didn't know what to say. She sat down next to me on the couch, wrapping her arms and tail around me, so I put my arm around her. She tries to kiss me, but I push her back and tell her no, explaining the biblical stance on marriage. She said that wasn't what I was saying that night we were kissing, but again I said I was drunk.
Then she asks me, "Is it worth marrying someone if your partner is of a different species and you don't know if their sexual equipment is compatible?" It wasn't a very subtle question, so I said if she's talking about an Abreya, then yes. Until I knew for certain, the marriage would be a valid thing. If it really was impossible, the two could just go their separate ways, but all that means is that their wedding shouldn't be a huge spectacle. She sadly nods and we just cuddle.
I have another study session with her, do some exercises, and prepare for bed.
When I was heading down to the crew quarters to sleep, I heard a shout. I went out to investigate, and Sigma was telling me to get ready to go and that the ship was here.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Stranded
Monday came and I was still stuck there.
I was fed up and frustrated and wanted to go home. I climbed up to Sigma, demanding that she get me out of there. I couldn't really stomp up to her since I was floating, but I wanted to.
She just told me to relax, and that the ship would arrive that evening. I told her I'd expected it Saturday and Sunday, but she said she never made that promise, but that it definitely would show up that evening. She didn't know exactly when.
So I waited.
I went about my usual duties.
At lunch, I asked Minda about the ship. She said it would arrive that evening.
I asked her if she had anything like a sabbath on her planet and she said yes, it was just different in space, especially with so many out sick. She said there was normally someone there to relieve you so that you can rest and do whatever while other people work. It sounded like a factory schedule to me.
I had nothing but clothing calls that day. The end of my shift came and no spaceship.
In the call center, in front of Jupiter, Minda taught me a song from her religion, and translated it for me. I still wasn't comfortable singing it, so I modified it with my own words about Jesus and sang it that way.
She seemed a bit offended at first, but then she started singing it with me, and Sigma joined in.
After that, we played a modified version of that game with the scoops, worked out on the exercise equipment, then watched cable in the break room.
While we were sitting there, Minda asked me if I meant all that stuff I said to her a couple nights ago.
I asked her what I said, and she said I told her about my feelings for her, how I found her physically attractive and might even love her in more than the agape sense.
I told her I was drunk, but I said I kinda did like her a lot.
So then she's snuggling up close and wrapping her tail around me. We just watched TV, with her purring on my shoulder.
After awhile, we played some alien board games, then I went to my own bed. Minda asked me if she could lay beside me, but I said it wouldn't be a good idea, and besides the bed is too small, so that was that.
I was fed up and frustrated and wanted to go home. I climbed up to Sigma, demanding that she get me out of there. I couldn't really stomp up to her since I was floating, but I wanted to.
She just told me to relax, and that the ship would arrive that evening. I told her I'd expected it Saturday and Sunday, but she said she never made that promise, but that it definitely would show up that evening. She didn't know exactly when.
So I waited.
I went about my usual duties.
At lunch, I asked Minda about the ship. She said it would arrive that evening.
I asked her if she had anything like a sabbath on her planet and she said yes, it was just different in space, especially with so many out sick. She said there was normally someone there to relieve you so that you can rest and do whatever while other people work. It sounded like a factory schedule to me.
I had nothing but clothing calls that day. The end of my shift came and no spaceship.
In the call center, in front of Jupiter, Minda taught me a song from her religion, and translated it for me. I still wasn't comfortable singing it, so I modified it with my own words about Jesus and sang it that way.
She seemed a bit offended at first, but then she started singing it with me, and Sigma joined in.
After that, we played a modified version of that game with the scoops, worked out on the exercise equipment, then watched cable in the break room.
While we were sitting there, Minda asked me if I meant all that stuff I said to her a couple nights ago.
I asked her what I said, and she said I told her about my feelings for her, how I found her physically attractive and might even love her in more than the agape sense.
I told her I was drunk, but I said I kinda did like her a lot.
So then she's snuggling up close and wrapping her tail around me. We just watched TV, with her purring on my shoulder.
After awhile, we played some alien board games, then I went to my own bed. Minda asked me if she could lay beside me, but I said it wouldn't be a good idea, and besides the bed is too small, so that was that.
Drunk out of my mind
Like I was saying, I woke up Sunday morning, and I was wearing a dress.
I was cold and wet, because I'd just been sprayed all over with some sort of alien Super Soaker.
With my head throbbing, I glared at the two Abreyas, yelling and cussing at them about how there was no good reason for waking me up that way.
Then they point to the clock. It was already part way into the start of my shift. I ask them what happened and they said there wasn't any time to explain.
I headed to the bathroom, but they said I didn't have time to shower or anything, they needed me on the phones.
I said I needed to use the toilet, but all they did was hand me the diaper thing. So I put it on and went to the phones.
Work was...interesting. Some of my customers complimented me on the dress. Others (mostly Dogos customers) said it wasn't professional and said I should be wearing a uniform. Other people didn't care, being too obsessed with their own problems.
The hours slowly crept by. When I came to her for help on a call, Minda complimented me on my outfit, which made me really embarrassed.
I had to deal with a registration issue with a Dogos customer, and answer a lot of questions about some bustier thing with a loincloth (for women), and then this one guy called about login problems. He said that his order was being shipped to the wrong planet, and he wanted it stopped before it went out because he no longer lives there. I told him I'd be happy to help him, but I couldn't verify his account information. He looked like he was lying, but he found some paper in his messy room and I had to help him.
Of course by that time, it was already halfway across the galaxy. There wasn't anything I could do. He started making all these demands and I kept telling him no. That call lasted to about the middle of my lunch time. I eventually managed a refund to shut him up. I eventually went into lunch, but only after I recorded some compliments (for a store location) and sent them to corporate.
I wanted to shower and change and everything, but I decided something more important had to be addressed.
I went down to the break room and found Minda at a table, grinning at me. I asked her what was so funny and she said I "looked cute." Whatever.
So I asked her what happened the previous night.
She said I got drunk and started dancing, and I gave them a fashion show. I asked her what else I did and she said that I kissed her, then I started blabbering about silly stuff and made everybody laugh. Then I started kissing her again. After that I fell asleep and they put me in my bed. I asked her if she were sure that's all I did and she just giggled.
That scared me. I became angry, angrier than I already was, and demanded she tell me what else I did. I told her I wanted my conscience to be clean before God and that I had a headache.
She sighed and told me we came close to doing something...wrong, and then I started preaching at her and I just ended up falling asleep on the couch and they had to carry me to bed.
I was horrified. I felt betrayed. I have always been afraid of getting drunk and doing something I regret. That's why I have never touched a drop before, even on my 21st birthday. And I'm 30. Unless you count communion wine, but obviously I wouldn't drink more than a sip of that. I felt disgusted at myself. Feeling sick to my stomach, I just took a quick shower, put on my proper uniform and went back to the phones.
Lesson for the day: Ask questions before you eat or drink or smoke anything indigenous. And ask the right questions.
When I went to ask Sigma for advice on a call, she said she was disappointed that I wasn't wearing the dress anymore. I ignored it and asked my question. After I got my answer, she asked me to "do that dance again." I told her I didn't know what she was talking about, so she does this goofy dance.
I just went back to the phone.
After my shift, I just recuperated from the...whatever the hell I drank. I had a bible study, exercised, and did the usual stuff to unwind. This did not include that juice, whatever it was called.
I was cold and wet, because I'd just been sprayed all over with some sort of alien Super Soaker.
With my head throbbing, I glared at the two Abreyas, yelling and cussing at them about how there was no good reason for waking me up that way.
Then they point to the clock. It was already part way into the start of my shift. I ask them what happened and they said there wasn't any time to explain.
I headed to the bathroom, but they said I didn't have time to shower or anything, they needed me on the phones.
I said I needed to use the toilet, but all they did was hand me the diaper thing. So I put it on and went to the phones.
Work was...interesting. Some of my customers complimented me on the dress. Others (mostly Dogos customers) said it wasn't professional and said I should be wearing a uniform. Other people didn't care, being too obsessed with their own problems.
The hours slowly crept by. When I came to her for help on a call, Minda complimented me on my outfit, which made me really embarrassed.
I had to deal with a registration issue with a Dogos customer, and answer a lot of questions about some bustier thing with a loincloth (for women), and then this one guy called about login problems. He said that his order was being shipped to the wrong planet, and he wanted it stopped before it went out because he no longer lives there. I told him I'd be happy to help him, but I couldn't verify his account information. He looked like he was lying, but he found some paper in his messy room and I had to help him.
Of course by that time, it was already halfway across the galaxy. There wasn't anything I could do. He started making all these demands and I kept telling him no. That call lasted to about the middle of my lunch time. I eventually managed a refund to shut him up. I eventually went into lunch, but only after I recorded some compliments (for a store location) and sent them to corporate.
I wanted to shower and change and everything, but I decided something more important had to be addressed.
I went down to the break room and found Minda at a table, grinning at me. I asked her what was so funny and she said I "looked cute." Whatever.
So I asked her what happened the previous night.
She said I got drunk and started dancing, and I gave them a fashion show. I asked her what else I did and she said that I kissed her, then I started blabbering about silly stuff and made everybody laugh. Then I started kissing her again. After that I fell asleep and they put me in my bed. I asked her if she were sure that's all I did and she just giggled.
That scared me. I became angry, angrier than I already was, and demanded she tell me what else I did. I told her I wanted my conscience to be clean before God and that I had a headache.
She sighed and told me we came close to doing something...wrong, and then I started preaching at her and I just ended up falling asleep on the couch and they had to carry me to bed.
I was horrified. I felt betrayed. I have always been afraid of getting drunk and doing something I regret. That's why I have never touched a drop before, even on my 21st birthday. And I'm 30. Unless you count communion wine, but obviously I wouldn't drink more than a sip of that. I felt disgusted at myself. Feeling sick to my stomach, I just took a quick shower, put on my proper uniform and went back to the phones.
Lesson for the day: Ask questions before you eat or drink or smoke anything indigenous. And ask the right questions.
When I went to ask Sigma for advice on a call, she said she was disappointed that I wasn't wearing the dress anymore. I ignored it and asked my question. After I got my answer, she asked me to "do that dance again." I told her I didn't know what she was talking about, so she does this goofy dance.
I just went back to the phone.
After my shift, I just recuperated from the...whatever the hell I drank. I had a bible study, exercised, and did the usual stuff to unwind. This did not include that juice, whatever it was called.
Fruit juice
Saturday came. No sign of the ship yet.
I had worked 48 hours total (and probably more due to training), but I was asked, or rather told, to work more. I got the news at breakfast. I had to change into my uniform and then go back to work. I wondered if these Abreyas had labor unions, but I figured I'd deal with that issue later. I had a call about malfunctioning spaceship appliances that turned out pretty well, a store search for a special vest made of Grunkiahu leather, whatever that is, and a call about the account system that got a little crazy. I guess someone hacked the system and took his money or something. I transferred him to the appropriate department. I got another call about accounts, but it wasn't about fraud that time. Then I had some other stuff, and a call about pre-ordering that led to a supervisor transfer (I didn't have the information, and he'd bought a Dogos package before that I guess didn't work out so well).
I went to lunch and asked Minda about the Wodov, but she didn't know when he'd be there, and that she'd keep watching while Sigma was gone.
I got a little distracted watching cable and logged into the phones late, but nobody said anything. I took more calls.
I got off the phone and went to the break room to watch TV. As I'm sitting there, Sigma and Minda come in and sit down on either side of me, and I'm offered a beverage. I asked what it was and they said "fruit juice," so I had some. It tasted good, so I drank more.
I wasn't sure what happened next, but when I woke up, I was in one of the beds, I was wearing that gray dress, and my head hurt. I surmised that I had ingested something alcoholic, but that was all I knew.
I had worked 48 hours total (and probably more due to training), but I was asked, or rather told, to work more. I got the news at breakfast. I had to change into my uniform and then go back to work. I wondered if these Abreyas had labor unions, but I figured I'd deal with that issue later. I had a call about malfunctioning spaceship appliances that turned out pretty well, a store search for a special vest made of Grunkiahu leather, whatever that is, and a call about the account system that got a little crazy. I guess someone hacked the system and took his money or something. I transferred him to the appropriate department. I got another call about accounts, but it wasn't about fraud that time. Then I had some other stuff, and a call about pre-ordering that led to a supervisor transfer (I didn't have the information, and he'd bought a Dogos package before that I guess didn't work out so well).
I went to lunch and asked Minda about the Wodov, but she didn't know when he'd be there, and that she'd keep watching while Sigma was gone.
I got a little distracted watching cable and logged into the phones late, but nobody said anything. I took more calls.
I got off the phone and went to the break room to watch TV. As I'm sitting there, Sigma and Minda come in and sit down on either side of me, and I'm offered a beverage. I asked what it was and they said "fruit juice," so I had some. It tasted good, so I drank more.
I wasn't sure what happened next, but when I woke up, I was in one of the beds, I was wearing that gray dress, and my head hurt. I surmised that I had ingested something alcoholic, but that was all I knew.
Friday at the space station
I was glad it was Friday. I thought I was going home. I thought about asking if we had casual Fridays, but I didn't bother because I didn't have much of a wardrobe at this point anyway. I made my morning preparations with a gusto and went down to the break room.
I sat down with Minda and asked her when I'd be going back and she said when the ship returns. I asked her when that was and she said "whenever" and that it depended largely on Mekhilta's transit time and/or if there were any complications with her trip. I asked if it were possible for that to be today and she said it was unlikely. That depressed me. I was tired of the weird food and diapers and vacuum toilets and not being able to go out to restaurants or parks or breathe fresh air. With reluctance I went back on the phones.
I didn't get any Dogos calls all day. I got nothing but calls about clothing. I had a couple escalated calls, one about me not knowing everything there is to know about a "dress" and "heels", the other was some guy complaining about how the security was so high and that he placed the order and wanted information I wasn't permitted to give him. The rest were okay, and I figured out how to negotiate to avoid it getting that far.
I had only one call related to the wild story I gave that paparazzi guy. Some guy asked me about my sexual exploits and if I'd ever done a Muperzguz or something. I shrugged and said maybe and laughed. Then I took care of his problem with his order.
I went to lunch then went back on the phones for a few more hours.
A lot of people seemed to hang up when they saw me. Not sure what that was about. They'd look at me, have this weird expression and then they'd disconnect. Oh well.
I logged off for the day and the two females took me aside and started asking about praise songs. I taught them a few, and we had sort of an informal praise service, which included an alien composition that Minda wrote. We studied and did the usual boring stuff until we retired for the night.
I sat down with Minda and asked her when I'd be going back and she said when the ship returns. I asked her when that was and she said "whenever" and that it depended largely on Mekhilta's transit time and/or if there were any complications with her trip. I asked if it were possible for that to be today and she said it was unlikely. That depressed me. I was tired of the weird food and diapers and vacuum toilets and not being able to go out to restaurants or parks or breathe fresh air. With reluctance I went back on the phones.
I didn't get any Dogos calls all day. I got nothing but calls about clothing. I had a couple escalated calls, one about me not knowing everything there is to know about a "dress" and "heels", the other was some guy complaining about how the security was so high and that he placed the order and wanted information I wasn't permitted to give him. The rest were okay, and I figured out how to negotiate to avoid it getting that far.
I had only one call related to the wild story I gave that paparazzi guy. Some guy asked me about my sexual exploits and if I'd ever done a Muperzguz or something. I shrugged and said maybe and laughed. Then I took care of his problem with his order.
I went to lunch then went back on the phones for a few more hours.
A lot of people seemed to hang up when they saw me. Not sure what that was about. They'd look at me, have this weird expression and then they'd disconnect. Oh well.
I logged off for the day and the two females took me aside and started asking about praise songs. I taught them a few, and we had sort of an informal praise service, which included an alien composition that Minda wrote. We studied and did the usual boring stuff until we retired for the night.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Uryanzor
Thursday, we had working toilets. I woke to find Wlodek sleeping on one of the bunks, and the machinery in the bathroom worked, of course. I still didn't have breaks, so I wore the usual outfit. I went down and had my breakfast.
The girls seemed to be in a much better mood and they talked to me. They told me I'd be speaking to that Wodov guy later that day so I said whatever and went on to the phones.
I had a pretty even mix of calls. I started out with Dogos calls, and then suddenly I was helping Abreyas with clothing orders.
I had to deal with a Uryanzor store complaint and several Uryanzor ordering system and login problems, in addition to the usual calls requesting a mechanic and Dogos account issues.
When I went to lunch, I found out that Wlodek was working on the showers and would have that done for us as well, which was excellent.
I sat with Minda and she told me about this Wodov guy I was going to talk to. She said he was a really nice guy, that he was well studied in the Quaceb faith and knew what he was talking about. She told me about how wise he was and how he ran her Reugen group and his credentials and what good things he did for the community. I was impressed and said it could definitely help to talk to him.
I finished up and went back to the phones. I soon got used to the new company and its customers and the flow of calls. Pre-order questions, account issues and some other things weren't that different from Bebe or Lacoste. The billing was hard to get used to, but other than that, the real difference was the clientele. These people seemed much more agreeable than the ones on earth. Of course, it could have been due to my status as a newbie, my strange looks, or it being an easy day. Not sure.
The end of my shift came, and the two Abreyas escorted me to the meeting room, where they set up a hologram device. They pushed some buttons and this old guy in a colorful dashiki thing appeared.
He stared at me, and I stared back. I guess their pelts turn gray when they get old, because his was near white. He looked very stern and serious.
I introduced myself and we got to talking. I told him my opinion on converting space aliens and everything, and said I wasn't sure what to think of the whole thing.
He told me he thought I was some kind of cult leader until he spoke to me. I just shrugged and explained my situation. We asked each other questions about our respective faiths, and then the guy says he wants to come see them at the station. Okay. I wasn't really sure how long that would take, but whatever.
I took some more calls. I had a weird, unfunny prank call, a call about clothing material, some guy confused on how we charged him for clothes (he didn't realize that we didn't need pending charges to process a payment) and some problem with misspelling. The good thing about this department was that you can't really get confused between companies when one guy complains about his spaceship and the other guy complains about his dress.
I guess that might change if they add another clothing store to my skill set, but whatever. I kept hoping the upcoming paycheck would make it worthwhile.
All through the latter part of my shift, I kept hearing banging sounds coming from somewhere. Once I got logged off the phones, I discovered that Wlodek had fixed the showers. I hurried through a workout and immediately used them. It was great.
When I got out and dried myself in one of their machines, I noticed my clothes were missing. At first, I thought they had drifted off, but then I heard laughing. I hid in a stall (thankfully they were opaque) and yelled for whoever it was to bring my clothes back. After I stood there naked for a few minutes, I saw Sigma's grinning face at the crack in the door. She handed me my old clothes (my jeans and t-shirt!) and said they'd been washed. At last! So I put them on. With the exception of my time on the phones, I would keep wearing them for the rest of the time I stayed there.
Anyways, after I got dressed, I told her not to play that kind of game with me, that a good Christian would respect a man's virtue and respect herself enough not to do that sort of thing. She responds by asking me if I thought it sinful to see a naked monkey in a zoo, or see a naked dog. I said no, and she said it was the same thing with me. I told her that her actions betrayed what she was saying, and she said mine did, too. I didn't know what to say next, so I just told her to never do that again.
I taught the two some more about the bible, and they taught me their book. I cleaned my teeth with that thing, then killed time the usual way until bedtime.
The girls seemed to be in a much better mood and they talked to me. They told me I'd be speaking to that Wodov guy later that day so I said whatever and went on to the phones.
I had a pretty even mix of calls. I started out with Dogos calls, and then suddenly I was helping Abreyas with clothing orders.
I had to deal with a Uryanzor store complaint and several Uryanzor ordering system and login problems, in addition to the usual calls requesting a mechanic and Dogos account issues.
When I went to lunch, I found out that Wlodek was working on the showers and would have that done for us as well, which was excellent.
I sat with Minda and she told me about this Wodov guy I was going to talk to. She said he was a really nice guy, that he was well studied in the Quaceb faith and knew what he was talking about. She told me about how wise he was and how he ran her Reugen group and his credentials and what good things he did for the community. I was impressed and said it could definitely help to talk to him.
I finished up and went back to the phones. I soon got used to the new company and its customers and the flow of calls. Pre-order questions, account issues and some other things weren't that different from Bebe or Lacoste. The billing was hard to get used to, but other than that, the real difference was the clientele. These people seemed much more agreeable than the ones on earth. Of course, it could have been due to my status as a newbie, my strange looks, or it being an easy day. Not sure.
The end of my shift came, and the two Abreyas escorted me to the meeting room, where they set up a hologram device. They pushed some buttons and this old guy in a colorful dashiki thing appeared.
He stared at me, and I stared back. I guess their pelts turn gray when they get old, because his was near white. He looked very stern and serious.
I introduced myself and we got to talking. I told him my opinion on converting space aliens and everything, and said I wasn't sure what to think of the whole thing.
He told me he thought I was some kind of cult leader until he spoke to me. I just shrugged and explained my situation. We asked each other questions about our respective faiths, and then the guy says he wants to come see them at the station. Okay. I wasn't really sure how long that would take, but whatever.
I took some more calls. I had a weird, unfunny prank call, a call about clothing material, some guy confused on how we charged him for clothes (he didn't realize that we didn't need pending charges to process a payment) and some problem with misspelling. The good thing about this department was that you can't really get confused between companies when one guy complains about his spaceship and the other guy complains about his dress.
I guess that might change if they add another clothing store to my skill set, but whatever. I kept hoping the upcoming paycheck would make it worthwhile.
All through the latter part of my shift, I kept hearing banging sounds coming from somewhere. Once I got logged off the phones, I discovered that Wlodek had fixed the showers. I hurried through a workout and immediately used them. It was great.
When I got out and dried myself in one of their machines, I noticed my clothes were missing. At first, I thought they had drifted off, but then I heard laughing. I hid in a stall (thankfully they were opaque) and yelled for whoever it was to bring my clothes back. After I stood there naked for a few minutes, I saw Sigma's grinning face at the crack in the door. She handed me my old clothes (my jeans and t-shirt!) and said they'd been washed. At last! So I put them on. With the exception of my time on the phones, I would keep wearing them for the rest of the time I stayed there.
Anyways, after I got dressed, I told her not to play that kind of game with me, that a good Christian would respect a man's virtue and respect herself enough not to do that sort of thing. She responds by asking me if I thought it sinful to see a naked monkey in a zoo, or see a naked dog. I said no, and she said it was the same thing with me. I told her that her actions betrayed what she was saying, and she said mine did, too. I didn't know what to say next, so I just told her to never do that again.
I taught the two some more about the bible, and they taught me their book. I cleaned my teeth with that thing, then killed time the usual way until bedtime.
Isolation
The following morning was equally quiet. They made it a point to avoid me. That could have depressed me, but I was looking forward to actually having working toilets on board, since they said they'd be fixed that day.
I ate by myself and went to the phones.
Things were going okay until I had a call about an accounts security related problem. The fact that she knew me from the paparazzi didn't help matters. It escalated and I needed a supervisor. I found Minda, but she gave me a cold brush-off like supervisors at my old department did. Did you check in the knowledge center. You shouldn't be doing x, now go handle the call that you can't handle. On the subliminal level, they are saying "Don't talk to me. Go away." I ended up sending it to another department, on another planet, I'm guessing.
I took one call about alien clothing, which was a strange experience. I spoke to this guy that acted like a sissy when he didn't get his boots. And I mean a sissy. He didn't act manly at all about it. After that, I went to lunch and sat in the break room all by myself. Nothing new about that. I'm a loner. I've been eating alone for years before I came to Jupiter.
Being alone like that gave me a lot of time to think about things. I started to figure out I had feelings for these aliens, and I cared about them, and I really wanted to help them to get to this "Chisda" they spoke of.
Also, I realized that being in isolation tends to increase one's fear of abandonment.
I went back to the phones.
At the end of my shift, as I'm leaving my desk, both Sigma and Minda approach me and say that Jesus might be their religion's messiah,a nd they wanted him in their lives. And so, after telling Minda that she won't go to Beptot for rejecting Jesus since she came back, I asked them to apologize to my God and led them both into a conversion. Again.
Very awkward. I wasn't sure if this was what space aliens needed, but I felt better, I guess.
We did some studying then. They showed me the prophecies from their book and said it had to be Jesus and that's what made sense and it seemed plausible to me the way they said it. But I really didn't know their holy texts well enough to be certain.
Once we stopped for the evening, I had a workout and watched cable and went to the crew quarters.
As I was going to my bed, Sigma came up to me with another clear package. She pulls out the contents and I see it's a cape and some silky gray dress with elegant patterns stitched into it with red thread. She told me it would look good on me, but I said no.
As I was lying there in my bed, I heard banging sounds. I followed them to the bathroom, where I saw a male Abreya in person for the first time. His name was Wlodek. He had a gold pelt and wore a blue halter jumpsuit with harem pants. I wasn't too bothered by the outfit because I'd seen them wearing that on the hologram, but I still thought it was weird. The good thing part was that he was fixing the plumbing, which made me very pleased.
I ate by myself and went to the phones.
Things were going okay until I had a call about an accounts security related problem. The fact that she knew me from the paparazzi didn't help matters. It escalated and I needed a supervisor. I found Minda, but she gave me a cold brush-off like supervisors at my old department did. Did you check in the knowledge center. You shouldn't be doing x, now go handle the call that you can't handle. On the subliminal level, they are saying "Don't talk to me. Go away." I ended up sending it to another department, on another planet, I'm guessing.
I took one call about alien clothing, which was a strange experience. I spoke to this guy that acted like a sissy when he didn't get his boots. And I mean a sissy. He didn't act manly at all about it. After that, I went to lunch and sat in the break room all by myself. Nothing new about that. I'm a loner. I've been eating alone for years before I came to Jupiter.
Being alone like that gave me a lot of time to think about things. I started to figure out I had feelings for these aliens, and I cared about them, and I really wanted to help them to get to this "Chisda" they spoke of.
Also, I realized that being in isolation tends to increase one's fear of abandonment.
I went back to the phones.
At the end of my shift, as I'm leaving my desk, both Sigma and Minda approach me and say that Jesus might be their religion's messiah,a nd they wanted him in their lives. And so, after telling Minda that she won't go to Beptot for rejecting Jesus since she came back, I asked them to apologize to my God and led them both into a conversion. Again.
Very awkward. I wasn't sure if this was what space aliens needed, but I felt better, I guess.
We did some studying then. They showed me the prophecies from their book and said it had to be Jesus and that's what made sense and it seemed plausible to me the way they said it. But I really didn't know their holy texts well enough to be certain.
Once we stopped for the evening, I had a workout and watched cable and went to the crew quarters.
As I was going to my bed, Sigma came up to me with another clear package. She pulls out the contents and I see it's a cape and some silky gray dress with elegant patterns stitched into it with red thread. She told me it would look good on me, but I said no.
As I was lying there in my bed, I heard banging sounds. I followed them to the bathroom, where I saw a male Abreya in person for the first time. His name was Wlodek. He had a gold pelt and wore a blue halter jumpsuit with harem pants. I wasn't too bothered by the outfit because I'd seen them wearing that on the hologram, but I still thought it was weird. The good thing part was that he was fixing the plumbing, which made me very pleased.
Monday, September 28, 2009
Religious spat
After the usual preparations, and a lesson about emptying out my "stillsuit" (Minda showed me a vacuum attachment on the wall you plug into a pocket on the side), I went down to breakfast.
As I and Minda were eating, Sigma comes in and starts yelling at us. I didn't really know what her problem was, since she really never behaved like a religious person anyway.
But during the course of her ranting, I surmised she was afraid that the rest of her crew would also convert, and that it might somehow cripple business.
I just shrugged and said it wasn't under my control.
After this, she said she was going to "make things very painful" for the both of us, unless we changed our ways.
Minda looked a little upset about that, but personally I didn't care what happened to me. I told her she wasn't convincing me to believe her religion was right, or that Minda was missing anything by becoming an apostate. After that, Sigma asked Minda to pray with her.
She did, and after voicing her concerns, Minda prayed about hers, and Minda started expressing her doubts. The next moment she was apologizing to Ponai for Jesus worship and we were back on square one again. I gave up and went upstairs to work.
It was the usual stuff. No clothing calls, no paparazzi. Just the usual weird Onstar thing.
At the designated time, I logged off the phone and went down to the break room to have lunch. When I got there, I saw Minda seated at a table, studying the Gaxea. When she saw me entering the room, she seemed to pale, then she was packing up her food and taking it elsewhere. I decided to leave her alone. I just ate by myself. Then I went back to the phones and did that for a few more hours.
When my shift ended, Sigma, looking sort of smug, put me through another introduction to the clothing company I'd be doing calls for. I learned about the product, the marketplace, the clothing terms, and the way the reward system worked. We went over the general etiquette of communication with these new "clients" and then I just killed time on the space station. I could have done more work, but eight hours is far too much for me already.
I played a couple computer games by myself, tried to read their books, exercised and went to bed. Everyone avoided me, so it was a pretty quiet evening.
As I and Minda were eating, Sigma comes in and starts yelling at us. I didn't really know what her problem was, since she really never behaved like a religious person anyway.
But during the course of her ranting, I surmised she was afraid that the rest of her crew would also convert, and that it might somehow cripple business.
I just shrugged and said it wasn't under my control.
After this, she said she was going to "make things very painful" for the both of us, unless we changed our ways.
Minda looked a little upset about that, but personally I didn't care what happened to me. I told her she wasn't convincing me to believe her religion was right, or that Minda was missing anything by becoming an apostate. After that, Sigma asked Minda to pray with her.
She did, and after voicing her concerns, Minda prayed about hers, and Minda started expressing her doubts. The next moment she was apologizing to Ponai for Jesus worship and we were back on square one again. I gave up and went upstairs to work.
It was the usual stuff. No clothing calls, no paparazzi. Just the usual weird Onstar thing.
At the designated time, I logged off the phone and went down to the break room to have lunch. When I got there, I saw Minda seated at a table, studying the Gaxea. When she saw me entering the room, she seemed to pale, then she was packing up her food and taking it elsewhere. I decided to leave her alone. I just ate by myself. Then I went back to the phones and did that for a few more hours.
When my shift ended, Sigma, looking sort of smug, put me through another introduction to the clothing company I'd be doing calls for. I learned about the product, the marketplace, the clothing terms, and the way the reward system worked. We went over the general etiquette of communication with these new "clients" and then I just killed time on the space station. I could have done more work, but eight hours is far too much for me already.
I played a couple computer games by myself, tried to read their books, exercised and went to bed. Everyone avoided me, so it was a pretty quiet evening.
The conflict begins
As I was climbing my way to the workout room, Sigma stopped me and gave me this long lecture on how I was wrong to convert her friend. I told her she'd asked for it and I had no idea if it were the right thing to do. I just did it because she asked. She said that, because of me, Minda wasn't going to Chisda, her version of heaven. So I repeated the fact that I'd been asked to do that, and it really wasn't my decision. She argued that I taught her all that stuff and so it was supposedly my fault. I told her I believed people had something called a free will, and that it allows them to make wise decisions and poor decisions alike, and that I never once threatened her to do anything. So she sighed and went away, and I had my workout.
After that, I had a study session with Minda. We read through her holy text and read from the bible and talked about them both. She found some interesting prophecies in the Gaxea, stuff that could be construed to mean Jesus, but I pointed out that they could be interpreted to mean other people as well. She said nobody else really fit the bill, so I wasn't sure what to make of that.
Halfway through our study session, Sigma came in, looking angry. She told me to stop teaching "my myths" to Minda, and that she could fire me for creating a hostile work environment. I told her it's not my fault, Minda was just curious. So she asked to speak with me privately.
So Minda leaves the room and she tells me to convince Minda not to believe in Jesus, and that she'll really fire me if I keep this up. I told her that really sounded like religious discrimination, and said I couldn't do anything about it. I was a bit gleeful at turning the tables on her, but I tried to hide my emotions so that things wouldn't get worse. I told her firing me wouldn't change Minda's mind, but only reinforce her convictions, so she floated off in a fuming snort.
I went back to studying with Minda. She was so obsessed with her spiritual crisis that she didn't want to do anything but search for answers, so I didn't do anything but study with her until bedtime.
Up to now, I hadn't brushed my teeth or flossed at all, and it's been about two days. I asked Minda if she had anything like a toothbrush onboard, and she takes out this small device.
It looks like a crab. Some kind of robot or something. I watch her stick it in her mouth and it pokes and drills and sprays like a miniature dentist.
She takes another one out of storage and hands it to me.
When I tried the thing, it started stabbing my tongue so I had to pull it out. Minda quickly reprogrammed it and it worked fine after that. Better than a toothbrush any day.
I got into my "jogging pants" and went to sleep.
After that, I had a study session with Minda. We read through her holy text and read from the bible and talked about them both. She found some interesting prophecies in the Gaxea, stuff that could be construed to mean Jesus, but I pointed out that they could be interpreted to mean other people as well. She said nobody else really fit the bill, so I wasn't sure what to make of that.
Halfway through our study session, Sigma came in, looking angry. She told me to stop teaching "my myths" to Minda, and that she could fire me for creating a hostile work environment. I told her it's not my fault, Minda was just curious. So she asked to speak with me privately.
So Minda leaves the room and she tells me to convince Minda not to believe in Jesus, and that she'll really fire me if I keep this up. I told her that really sounded like religious discrimination, and said I couldn't do anything about it. I was a bit gleeful at turning the tables on her, but I tried to hide my emotions so that things wouldn't get worse. I told her firing me wouldn't change Minda's mind, but only reinforce her convictions, so she floated off in a fuming snort.
I went back to studying with Minda. She was so obsessed with her spiritual crisis that she didn't want to do anything but search for answers, so I didn't do anything but study with her until bedtime.
Up to now, I hadn't brushed my teeth or flossed at all, and it's been about two days. I asked Minda if she had anything like a toothbrush onboard, and she takes out this small device.
It looks like a crab. Some kind of robot or something. I watch her stick it in her mouth and it pokes and drills and sprays like a miniature dentist.
She takes another one out of storage and hands it to me.
When I tried the thing, it started stabbing my tongue so I had to pull it out. Minda quickly reprogrammed it and it worked fine after that. Better than a toothbrush any day.
I got into my "jogging pants" and went to sleep.
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Crisis of faith
At the space station.
Monday morning I woke up early as usual. I "showered" with that brush thing, etc., because the plumbing still wasn't fixed, then went down to breakfast.
I found nobody in the break room. Figuring they were working, I got my breakfast and went up to start working myself. For the first part of my shift, I got a bunch of Onstar type calls.
I didn't mention it before, but having a "video phone" is both enlightening and distracting. For one thing, you can see everything within the window of the "camera". Everything. This is helpful when they want to tell you about something that words cannot adequately describe. However, there were also some unpleasant visuals I wished I hadn't seen, and at times I saw fascinating things in the background that made me lose focus on the task at hand. There were pets, babies and odd alien lifeforms that totally threw me off the topic of conversation when I saw them. And a couple times I almost screamed when I saw something creeping up behind the "caller." Another distraction was their manner of dress, or undress. Some people dressed up for the "camera". Others didn't seem to care about anything and wore slovenly, shabby clothes, dirty clothes, or next to nothing or literally nothing. But later I learned how to shut off the picture.
Anyways, I had a call about failing air equipment, a couple calls about malfunctioning alarm systems, and some others, then I had another guy asking for a supervisor. Something about broken refrigeration units. I tried the escalation line, but nobody answered, so I got up, looking around the ship to find help.
Minda was gone, and so was Sigma. I checked the conference room, the break rooms, the garden, I even shouted in the bathroom to see if I could get someone.
I eventually found them in the crew quarters, sitting on a bed and talking in their language. When I came in, they gave me a worried look, and they started asking me religious questions. I told them I had a supervisor call and would be happy to answer them later, but Minda said this couldn't wait and that nothing else is more important than this discussion.
Sigma clicked something on a computer she had and said the phones were shut down. Then the two asked me the questions again. I told them what I knew about my religion, but said that anything related to aliens was just guessing. They didn't care, so we had a long theological discussion. I found out that Minda had been having night terrors for some time and hadn't been telling anyone, and the night before, when I was asleep, she'd been crying out, enough to wake up Sigma. (I don't know what Sigma was doing sleeping in the crew quarters when she had a nicer bedroom up top, but whatever). It had woken her up, and she'd gotten worried for her friend. She seemed a little worried herself, but she seemed intent on trying to convince Minda that their god grades on a curve and that my religion is fine for my people but not for hers.
I found myself getting angry, despite the fact there wasn't any clear moral stance to take in this situation. They are space aliens, after all.
I fumed silently in frustration, my emotionally charged opinions thwarted by an absolute lack of concrete textual support.
So then Minda wants to pray and they wanted me to pray with them. I told them I wouldn't be doing that because my God gets angry when I pray in the names of other gods. She said Ponai is just another name of God, but I said people used that same line to argue for the worship of Buddha and Allah, and since those arguments are wrong, there was no reason for me to believe that hers was right. I said I needed to research her religion and check with my God to see if this were acceptable. But I said I'd watch them pray. So I did that.
They touched their fingers together in a funny way and voiced their concerns to Ponai in their own language, basically asking for guidance for them, and, oddly enough, for me, and they asked Ponai to use me for communicating his message, and provide guidance. Once done, they told me they'd check with some guy named "Wodov" and that I should go back to the phones. So I did.
I called the fire department for one caller, requested a repair of a hologram system for another, then contacted "animal control" for some guy that had bugs filling the ship from ceiling to floor.
I was waiting for (or perhaps dreading) some calls about that...whatever they were telling me about, but I didn't get any.
I took more calls and went to lunch.
I went down to the lunch room and saw Minda looking at me expectantly. I got my food, sitting down across from her, and she says she wants to be saved. As in what Christian groups mean by the expression. So I led her through the prayer and everything. I've never converted anyone, so it made me kind of happy. However, I kept wondering if it were the same as preaching the gospel to the Labrador retriever in my basement. Pistol doesn't talk, but I wasn't sure if God wanted me converting space aliens.
I told her some more about the Christian faith walk, then finished my lunch and went back to the phones.
After doing a name change on account for a customer, I had my first dealing with the call center Paparazzi. This Abreya guy, surrounded with weird equipment, asked me to smile, then started asking me all these questions unrelated to the job, like my romantic life. I didn't take too kindly to this and replied with ridiculous answers. The calls I had after that were relatively normal. A misdirected call about mechanical defects in a popular brand name spaceship, amperage issues on an electrified burglar trap, questions about food built in processing units.
I had one last call about payroll and then I was able to clock out for the day.
Monday morning I woke up early as usual. I "showered" with that brush thing, etc., because the plumbing still wasn't fixed, then went down to breakfast.
I found nobody in the break room. Figuring they were working, I got my breakfast and went up to start working myself. For the first part of my shift, I got a bunch of Onstar type calls.
I didn't mention it before, but having a "video phone" is both enlightening and distracting. For one thing, you can see everything within the window of the "camera". Everything. This is helpful when they want to tell you about something that words cannot adequately describe. However, there were also some unpleasant visuals I wished I hadn't seen, and at times I saw fascinating things in the background that made me lose focus on the task at hand. There were pets, babies and odd alien lifeforms that totally threw me off the topic of conversation when I saw them. And a couple times I almost screamed when I saw something creeping up behind the "caller." Another distraction was their manner of dress, or undress. Some people dressed up for the "camera". Others didn't seem to care about anything and wore slovenly, shabby clothes, dirty clothes, or next to nothing or literally nothing. But later I learned how to shut off the picture.
Anyways, I had a call about failing air equipment, a couple calls about malfunctioning alarm systems, and some others, then I had another guy asking for a supervisor. Something about broken refrigeration units. I tried the escalation line, but nobody answered, so I got up, looking around the ship to find help.
Minda was gone, and so was Sigma. I checked the conference room, the break rooms, the garden, I even shouted in the bathroom to see if I could get someone.
I eventually found them in the crew quarters, sitting on a bed and talking in their language. When I came in, they gave me a worried look, and they started asking me religious questions. I told them I had a supervisor call and would be happy to answer them later, but Minda said this couldn't wait and that nothing else is more important than this discussion.
Sigma clicked something on a computer she had and said the phones were shut down. Then the two asked me the questions again. I told them what I knew about my religion, but said that anything related to aliens was just guessing. They didn't care, so we had a long theological discussion. I found out that Minda had been having night terrors for some time and hadn't been telling anyone, and the night before, when I was asleep, she'd been crying out, enough to wake up Sigma. (I don't know what Sigma was doing sleeping in the crew quarters when she had a nicer bedroom up top, but whatever). It had woken her up, and she'd gotten worried for her friend. She seemed a little worried herself, but she seemed intent on trying to convince Minda that their god grades on a curve and that my religion is fine for my people but not for hers.
I found myself getting angry, despite the fact there wasn't any clear moral stance to take in this situation. They are space aliens, after all.
I fumed silently in frustration, my emotionally charged opinions thwarted by an absolute lack of concrete textual support.
So then Minda wants to pray and they wanted me to pray with them. I told them I wouldn't be doing that because my God gets angry when I pray in the names of other gods. She said Ponai is just another name of God, but I said people used that same line to argue for the worship of Buddha and Allah, and since those arguments are wrong, there was no reason for me to believe that hers was right. I said I needed to research her religion and check with my God to see if this were acceptable. But I said I'd watch them pray. So I did that.
They touched their fingers together in a funny way and voiced their concerns to Ponai in their own language, basically asking for guidance for them, and, oddly enough, for me, and they asked Ponai to use me for communicating his message, and provide guidance. Once done, they told me they'd check with some guy named "Wodov" and that I should go back to the phones. So I did.
I called the fire department for one caller, requested a repair of a hologram system for another, then contacted "animal control" for some guy that had bugs filling the ship from ceiling to floor.
I was waiting for (or perhaps dreading) some calls about that...whatever they were telling me about, but I didn't get any.
I took more calls and went to lunch.
I went down to the lunch room and saw Minda looking at me expectantly. I got my food, sitting down across from her, and she says she wants to be saved. As in what Christian groups mean by the expression. So I led her through the prayer and everything. I've never converted anyone, so it made me kind of happy. However, I kept wondering if it were the same as preaching the gospel to the Labrador retriever in my basement. Pistol doesn't talk, but I wasn't sure if God wanted me converting space aliens.
I told her some more about the Christian faith walk, then finished my lunch and went back to the phones.
After doing a name change on account for a customer, I had my first dealing with the call center Paparazzi. This Abreya guy, surrounded with weird equipment, asked me to smile, then started asking me all these questions unrelated to the job, like my romantic life. I didn't take too kindly to this and replied with ridiculous answers. The calls I had after that were relatively normal. A misdirected call about mechanical defects in a popular brand name spaceship, amperage issues on an electrified burglar trap, questions about food built in processing units.
I had one last call about payroll and then I was able to clock out for the day.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Alien religion
After working at the station call center, I spent some more time staring at Jupiter. You can't get tired of something like this, seeing it up close and watching it change.
I noticed Minda floating up to me again. She didn't seem as interested in the view. She talked to me about a hairy call she had. I wasn't too interested, having had my fill of craziness, and she must have picked up on that because she changed the subject.
She told me that on her planet, there is a subculture that posts reviews of phone reps along with their pictures, so it's important to do well. I thought that was horrible. She shrugged and said there wasn't anything anyone could do. I told her that my planet has laws against slander and libel like that, but she asked me about tabloid newspapers. I told her that was for famous people and she said we were sort of famous. So I sort of understood then. We then got on the topic of music.
She has strange tastes. When I told her what music I liked, she said her favorite song is the Beepbeep.com jingle. I thought that was awful. I told her it was on ten times a day and was advertising a company, so she said she also liked movie themes and recordings of animal calls. She told me it was common for lots of people on her planet to buy many recordings of animal calls, and that the animal call Pofdons (I guess they're like CD's) sold millions of copies, better than some rap CD's on earth. I asked her about her favorite movie themes. She liked a few that I liked, but a lot of them, however, were overplayed, like John Williams. I was amazed, however, that she liked that little song that was in the movie Troll. Very few people even know what that is. We talked about some other stuff, like video games, then she showed me a new game on the computer. One was like a sports game where Abreyas in jumpsuits played polo on the backs of giant bird creatures, and then I played a couple others that were like racing and action games.
When I tired of messing with them, we went into the conference room and watched cable.
As we were watching a program, she asked me what I thought about the afterlife, so I told her.
She asked me if I thought aliens went there, and I said I didn't know, the bible didn't say anything about it and I guessed they had their own place.
She asked me what if they didn't, and I said I didn't know. She told me they didn't have anyone equivalent to Jesus, and they offered sacrifices to atone for sins.
I asked her how she took care of that on the station, and she said she didn't. She said she was afraid of going to Beptot, their version of hell. She asked me if I thought Jesus could save her, and I said possibly, but I really didn't know if it applied to space aliens.
She said she hoped he did and then said she wondered which religion was true.
I told her I believe mine (the Judeo-Christian one) is true, that every other religion on earth isn't, but I didn't know anything about hers, so I couldn't tell.
So she started telling me all this stuff about her religion. She said she believed that her god, Ponai, sculpted the entire universe out of stellar nurseries, and crafted all life forms from a soup of proteins and chromosomes. She said that her people had a temptation similar to Adam's at the beginning of her race, but they didn't give in to it, and as a reward Ponai taught them space flight and other technologies, but then something happened. Her people called it "the great test", or "the great Qubitgarr" (a word that translates to something like `terrible wave of corruption'). The Gaxea, their holy "book" (it's composed of thousand year old computer documents) said that a giant wave swept over the galaxy from a far off place, infecting everything with evil. She said the source of it is unknown even to this day, but scholars say it is either a test from Ponai or that an evil entity called Kaon called it to happen. Another theory is that an Abreya named Mustafa succombed to the first temptation after a hundred years of peace, but that's an apocryphal story.
She said she'd been watching some of my planet's religious broadcasts and heard of how Adam's sin caused the entire world to be corrupted, and wondered how far the corruption spread. I told her that was very creative, but I really couldn't say for sure.
I asked her how much she watched such programs and she said not often, because she found them boring, or too busy preaching about how praying and doing good deeds could make you a millionaire, but she had learned about Adam and all that.
I told her I didn't know what the right course of action would be, since the bible doesn't say anything about space aliens.
She asked me if I knew what I was talking about and I said yes, I study the bible more than most people I know, with the exception of my pastor.
I said it would be ridiculous to assume that a culture, one that believed that space was just a dome that covered the earth, would think that there was anything but God and angels and heaven up there when they didn't even know about planets.
When she asked me if I thought she was an angel, I said no. She asked me how I could believe in aliens if my religion didn't teach about it and I said God can make whatever He wants, and the bible doesn't talk about gravity or electromagnets, either.
Of course she got confused and I had to tell her that I believed creation is like what it says in Genesis, but that simple words like "light" and "firmament" can have complicated, possibly scientific meanings unknown to the original authors. After all, the earth's atmosphere is arguably a dome of sorts. That being said, I told her, I couldn't make a case for anything regarding extraterrestrials based on the bible. Unless you're talking about angels or something.
We debated the subject a bit further. She finally told me she needed to research this a bit further and she'd get back to me.
I went down and wandered the garden, then paid the caged creatures a visit.
Figuring I was a tough enough guy, I made motions like I were going to reach into a cage to pet one, but it snapped at me. Not nice.
The one next to it was just like it, so I decided they deserved to be dinner and moved on.
I'd noticed a bookcase in the main conference room, so I went up there and tried to read one of the books.
It was in their language so I really wasn't sure what I was reading. I thought it was fantasy, but it confused me. I knew the basics of communication, and this was full of higher level vocabulary. The other books were no better. I put them up and headed to the sleeping quarters.
I found Minda sitting on one of the jellyfish things, clicking buttons on a small device she had. She seemed completely engrossed in whatever it was and didn't even notice when I came in.
I found a transparent package tucked inside the flaps of my bed. I looked inside and found a gold jumpsuit made of some cottony material. It was kind of bizarre looking. The top part had no shoulder straps, being more like a tube top, and the bottom portion looked like capris.
After apologizing for interrupting her studies, I showed Minda the jumpsuit and asked if it were hers. She said no, Sigma got it for me.
After staring at it a minute, I decided it might look okay if I put the tunic over it. Guys wear yellow jogging pants, right?
Anyways, I changed and went to bed. Like the night before, I tossed and turned for awhile. It didn't help that someone was having a religious crisis on the bunk below me and they kept making sounds with their computer thing while I was trying to sleep.
Eventually I got settled and got some rest.
I noticed Minda floating up to me again. She didn't seem as interested in the view. She talked to me about a hairy call she had. I wasn't too interested, having had my fill of craziness, and she must have picked up on that because she changed the subject.
She told me that on her planet, there is a subculture that posts reviews of phone reps along with their pictures, so it's important to do well. I thought that was horrible. She shrugged and said there wasn't anything anyone could do. I told her that my planet has laws against slander and libel like that, but she asked me about tabloid newspapers. I told her that was for famous people and she said we were sort of famous. So I sort of understood then. We then got on the topic of music.
She has strange tastes. When I told her what music I liked, she said her favorite song is the Beepbeep.com jingle. I thought that was awful. I told her it was on ten times a day and was advertising a company, so she said she also liked movie themes and recordings of animal calls. She told me it was common for lots of people on her planet to buy many recordings of animal calls, and that the animal call Pofdons (I guess they're like CD's) sold millions of copies, better than some rap CD's on earth. I asked her about her favorite movie themes. She liked a few that I liked, but a lot of them, however, were overplayed, like John Williams. I was amazed, however, that she liked that little song that was in the movie Troll. Very few people even know what that is. We talked about some other stuff, like video games, then she showed me a new game on the computer. One was like a sports game where Abreyas in jumpsuits played polo on the backs of giant bird creatures, and then I played a couple others that were like racing and action games.
When I tired of messing with them, we went into the conference room and watched cable.
As we were watching a program, she asked me what I thought about the afterlife, so I told her.
She asked me if I thought aliens went there, and I said I didn't know, the bible didn't say anything about it and I guessed they had their own place.
She asked me what if they didn't, and I said I didn't know. She told me they didn't have anyone equivalent to Jesus, and they offered sacrifices to atone for sins.
I asked her how she took care of that on the station, and she said she didn't. She said she was afraid of going to Beptot, their version of hell. She asked me if I thought Jesus could save her, and I said possibly, but I really didn't know if it applied to space aliens.
She said she hoped he did and then said she wondered which religion was true.
I told her I believe mine (the Judeo-Christian one) is true, that every other religion on earth isn't, but I didn't know anything about hers, so I couldn't tell.
So she started telling me all this stuff about her religion. She said she believed that her god, Ponai, sculpted the entire universe out of stellar nurseries, and crafted all life forms from a soup of proteins and chromosomes. She said that her people had a temptation similar to Adam's at the beginning of her race, but they didn't give in to it, and as a reward Ponai taught them space flight and other technologies, but then something happened. Her people called it "the great test", or "the great Qubitgarr" (a word that translates to something like `terrible wave of corruption'). The Gaxea, their holy "book" (it's composed of thousand year old computer documents) said that a giant wave swept over the galaxy from a far off place, infecting everything with evil. She said the source of it is unknown even to this day, but scholars say it is either a test from Ponai or that an evil entity called Kaon called it to happen. Another theory is that an Abreya named Mustafa succombed to the first temptation after a hundred years of peace, but that's an apocryphal story.
She said she'd been watching some of my planet's religious broadcasts and heard of how Adam's sin caused the entire world to be corrupted, and wondered how far the corruption spread. I told her that was very creative, but I really couldn't say for sure.
I asked her how much she watched such programs and she said not often, because she found them boring, or too busy preaching about how praying and doing good deeds could make you a millionaire, but she had learned about Adam and all that.
I told her I didn't know what the right course of action would be, since the bible doesn't say anything about space aliens.
She asked me if I knew what I was talking about and I said yes, I study the bible more than most people I know, with the exception of my pastor.
I said it would be ridiculous to assume that a culture, one that believed that space was just a dome that covered the earth, would think that there was anything but God and angels and heaven up there when they didn't even know about planets.
When she asked me if I thought she was an angel, I said no. She asked me how I could believe in aliens if my religion didn't teach about it and I said God can make whatever He wants, and the bible doesn't talk about gravity or electromagnets, either.
Of course she got confused and I had to tell her that I believed creation is like what it says in Genesis, but that simple words like "light" and "firmament" can have complicated, possibly scientific meanings unknown to the original authors. After all, the earth's atmosphere is arguably a dome of sorts. That being said, I told her, I couldn't make a case for anything regarding extraterrestrials based on the bible. Unless you're talking about angels or something.
We debated the subject a bit further. She finally told me she needed to research this a bit further and she'd get back to me.
I went down and wandered the garden, then paid the caged creatures a visit.
Figuring I was a tough enough guy, I made motions like I were going to reach into a cage to pet one, but it snapped at me. Not nice.
The one next to it was just like it, so I decided they deserved to be dinner and moved on.
I'd noticed a bookcase in the main conference room, so I went up there and tried to read one of the books.
It was in their language so I really wasn't sure what I was reading. I thought it was fantasy, but it confused me. I knew the basics of communication, and this was full of higher level vocabulary. The other books were no better. I put them up and headed to the sleeping quarters.
I found Minda sitting on one of the jellyfish things, clicking buttons on a small device she had. She seemed completely engrossed in whatever it was and didn't even notice when I came in.
I found a transparent package tucked inside the flaps of my bed. I looked inside and found a gold jumpsuit made of some cottony material. It was kind of bizarre looking. The top part had no shoulder straps, being more like a tube top, and the bottom portion looked like capris.
After apologizing for interrupting her studies, I showed Minda the jumpsuit and asked if it were hers. She said no, Sigma got it for me.
After staring at it a minute, I decided it might look okay if I put the tunic over it. Guys wear yellow jogging pants, right?
Anyways, I changed and went to bed. Like the night before, I tossed and turned for awhile. It didn't help that someone was having a religious crisis on the bunk below me and they kept making sounds with their computer thing while I was trying to sleep.
Eventually I got settled and got some rest.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
An alien routine
The second day there, I woke up, and did what I had to because we didn't have working toilets. They said they'd have them repaired on Wednesday, so I had to make do until then. At least they were telling the truth about them being like a stillsuit so I didn't have to sit in it.
I probably slept six hours or less. I went to the big break room in search of breakfast. I found no one there. I looked upstairs, in the other break room and the conference room and the call center, then when I found nobody there I went back down and found Sigma waiting at a table. She was wearing a "uniform", but with a red tunic. She had a box for me, with that alien stuff in it. I went ahead and ate it. As I was eating, she asked me if I'd ever looked at porn. I told her I used to a long time ago, but I care too much about God to do that anymore.
She asked me what was wrong with it if you didn't actually do anything with the person in the picture, so I told her it was a sin of the heart.
Because she asked, I told her more details about my religious beliefs, including some things that I thought were obvious to just about everyone on earth.
It was Sunday, but she said I was working that day, and I would work until I returned to earth. I sighed and said fine.
Once I got done eating, I went upstairs and worked. This story is going long anyway so I'll spare all the details.
Sigma showed me how to use the scheduler to figure out when my lunch and work times were, so I was able to go to lunch exactly when the thing said to instead of having to wait for someone to tell me.
I went down to the break room kind of wondering where the food would come from. When I got there, Minda was at a table, eating, and she showed me the compartment where I could get food from.
I got my lunch and ate. I think she was nearing the end of her lunch, but she sat with me, and started asking more personal questions. Like if I had a girlfriend.
I told her I didn't, explaining that I'd that I've dealt with so many bitchy, emotionally manipulative women at Target and BBL that I avoid looking for women for fear of having to deal with one 24-7.
I told her that if women were like ninety percent of the customers I talked to at Target and BBL, I'd rather not marry.
She laughed and said "not all of us are like that." I told her that Mennonites and some hillbillies, and probably some ugly women are exceptions, but other than that, I wasn't ready for someone that looks pretty on the outside but unmasks her ugly interior self when she doesn't get her way.
She asked me if she was different. I said possibly, if she could prove to me that women aren't the same throughout the galaxy.
I told her how she made me uncomfortable the day before, and that she watches stuff that I consider immoral. But I told her I was fine with being friends.
We talked about some other things, about my social life, and that in comparison to other human beings, and earth culture in general, then Minda pointed to an electronic display and asked me when my lunch ended.
Since I'd studied the language enough, I figured out the readout was saying I was late and hurried back to my computer.
I went back to the phones for awhile, taking more calls. I discovered the supervisor transfer line and sent a few calls there when they got bad. I don't think I was doing a great job, but I figured I was doing good enough, and my previous experience in customer service didn't hurt.
The hours went by quickly due to the constant stream of calls and the complicated and sometimes frustrating nature of some of the problems, and customers.
Halfway close to the so-called "end of shift" on the scheduler (it's impossible to reckon time very accurately in space since 4:00 only means something if you know where the sun is supposed to be), Sigma floats up to me, telling me to go into meeting mode and to come with her to the conference room. I told her there wasn't anyone but Minda here, but I went into meeting and got out of my chair. She said that the chairs in the meeting room are better, so I followed her into the room.
So I followed her into the conference room. She was right. The chairs were more comfortable.
She told me they'd opened up a new division, and asked what I thought about selling Abreya clothes.
I asked her if she were kidding and she said no. Apparently there was this company called Uryanzor on her planet, and they sold apparel kind of like the stuff from that box she showed me. Men's skirts and all that.
She said if I didn't have a problem with it, she'd send some of those calls to me. I asked her how she could do that if we're being slammed with the other calls, and she said she had other call centers, and I wouldn't be doing that many.
Then I asked if I had to learn a new system, and she said yes, and I could start training at the end of my shift.
I kind of said I'd do it and that was that. I did more calls, and my shift ended.
I found Sigma working the phones, oddly enough. Knowing what I knew about her language, I figured out she was doing supervisor calls.
When she got done with the one she was on, and I had gotten an earful, she noticed me and showed me what programs to use in my computer to do training.
This was little different. There were modules for me to get acquainted with the company, the demographic, and the product itself. There was an inventory database, but a lot more sophisticated than Bebe's 360 tool. This one had a name search, so you were only limited by your vocabulary, and it had pictures.
You could put in vague words like "black dress" and "bag with the frills on the side" and it would find something. Not only that, but it actually asked you for clarifications if it was too vague.
If the same thing could be done in English in the 360 tool, the program communication would be something like this:
ME: Black dress with ruffles on the side
COMPUTER: Does this dress have shoulder straps?
ME: (Talks with customer) No
COMPUTER: What material is it made of?
ME: Satin or silk
COMPUTER: What year was it released?
ME: Not sure
COMPUTER: Was it released this year?
ME: (Checks with customer) Yes
COMPUTER: How much did it cost?
ME: Around $150
COMPUTER: It is either the Cassandra Slinky Dress (SKU 423423) or the Shimmery Satin Diva Dress (SKU 232342).
And it shows a picture of each one. And the prods prevent it from pulling up a hundred.
So it's got a sophisticated AI system, and it's not as stupid as the ones I've been using. The more I tried it, the more I sort of figured out the AI was telling me it was out of stock because it didn't have the info, but it made the job a lot easier.
Not only that, but I can show the picture to them, because it's a "video phone."
I learned some other programs, then I could relax and recuperate from all the craziness for awhile.
Sort of.
I probably slept six hours or less. I went to the big break room in search of breakfast. I found no one there. I looked upstairs, in the other break room and the conference room and the call center, then when I found nobody there I went back down and found Sigma waiting at a table. She was wearing a "uniform", but with a red tunic. She had a box for me, with that alien stuff in it. I went ahead and ate it. As I was eating, she asked me if I'd ever looked at porn. I told her I used to a long time ago, but I care too much about God to do that anymore.
She asked me what was wrong with it if you didn't actually do anything with the person in the picture, so I told her it was a sin of the heart.
Because she asked, I told her more details about my religious beliefs, including some things that I thought were obvious to just about everyone on earth.
It was Sunday, but she said I was working that day, and I would work until I returned to earth. I sighed and said fine.
Once I got done eating, I went upstairs and worked. This story is going long anyway so I'll spare all the details.
Sigma showed me how to use the scheduler to figure out when my lunch and work times were, so I was able to go to lunch exactly when the thing said to instead of having to wait for someone to tell me.
I went down to the break room kind of wondering where the food would come from. When I got there, Minda was at a table, eating, and she showed me the compartment where I could get food from.
I got my lunch and ate. I think she was nearing the end of her lunch, but she sat with me, and started asking more personal questions. Like if I had a girlfriend.
I told her I didn't, explaining that I'd that I've dealt with so many bitchy, emotionally manipulative women at Target and BBL that I avoid looking for women for fear of having to deal with one 24-7.
I told her that if women were like ninety percent of the customers I talked to at Target and BBL, I'd rather not marry.
She laughed and said "not all of us are like that." I told her that Mennonites and some hillbillies, and probably some ugly women are exceptions, but other than that, I wasn't ready for someone that looks pretty on the outside but unmasks her ugly interior self when she doesn't get her way.
She asked me if she was different. I said possibly, if she could prove to me that women aren't the same throughout the galaxy.
I told her how she made me uncomfortable the day before, and that she watches stuff that I consider immoral. But I told her I was fine with being friends.
We talked about some other things, about my social life, and that in comparison to other human beings, and earth culture in general, then Minda pointed to an electronic display and asked me when my lunch ended.
Since I'd studied the language enough, I figured out the readout was saying I was late and hurried back to my computer.
I went back to the phones for awhile, taking more calls. I discovered the supervisor transfer line and sent a few calls there when they got bad. I don't think I was doing a great job, but I figured I was doing good enough, and my previous experience in customer service didn't hurt.
The hours went by quickly due to the constant stream of calls and the complicated and sometimes frustrating nature of some of the problems, and customers.
Halfway close to the so-called "end of shift" on the scheduler (it's impossible to reckon time very accurately in space since 4:00 only means something if you know where the sun is supposed to be), Sigma floats up to me, telling me to go into meeting mode and to come with her to the conference room. I told her there wasn't anyone but Minda here, but I went into meeting and got out of my chair. She said that the chairs in the meeting room are better, so I followed her into the room.
So I followed her into the conference room. She was right. The chairs were more comfortable.
She told me they'd opened up a new division, and asked what I thought about selling Abreya clothes.
I asked her if she were kidding and she said no. Apparently there was this company called Uryanzor on her planet, and they sold apparel kind of like the stuff from that box she showed me. Men's skirts and all that.
She said if I didn't have a problem with it, she'd send some of those calls to me. I asked her how she could do that if we're being slammed with the other calls, and she said she had other call centers, and I wouldn't be doing that many.
Then I asked if I had to learn a new system, and she said yes, and I could start training at the end of my shift.
I kind of said I'd do it and that was that. I did more calls, and my shift ended.
I found Sigma working the phones, oddly enough. Knowing what I knew about her language, I figured out she was doing supervisor calls.
When she got done with the one she was on, and I had gotten an earful, she noticed me and showed me what programs to use in my computer to do training.
This was little different. There were modules for me to get acquainted with the company, the demographic, and the product itself. There was an inventory database, but a lot more sophisticated than Bebe's 360 tool. This one had a name search, so you were only limited by your vocabulary, and it had pictures.
You could put in vague words like "black dress" and "bag with the frills on the side" and it would find something. Not only that, but it actually asked you for clarifications if it was too vague.
If the same thing could be done in English in the 360 tool, the program communication would be something like this:
ME: Black dress with ruffles on the side
COMPUTER: Does this dress have shoulder straps?
ME: (Talks with customer) No
COMPUTER: What material is it made of?
ME: Satin or silk
COMPUTER: What year was it released?
ME: Not sure
COMPUTER: Was it released this year?
ME: (Checks with customer) Yes
COMPUTER: How much did it cost?
ME: Around $150
COMPUTER: It is either the Cassandra Slinky Dress (SKU 423423) or the Shimmery Satin Diva Dress (SKU 232342).
And it shows a picture of each one. And the prods prevent it from pulling up a hundred.
So it's got a sophisticated AI system, and it's not as stupid as the ones I've been using. The more I tried it, the more I sort of figured out the AI was telling me it was out of stock because it didn't have the info, but it made the job a lot easier.
Not only that, but I can show the picture to them, because it's a "video phone."
I learned some other programs, then I could relax and recuperate from all the craziness for awhile.
Sort of.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
Minda
My cable was out yesterday, so I couldn't post this until today.
I ended up just floating in front of the window, staring at Jupiter. It was very surreal to look at the moons slowly orbiting the place, and see the clouds and storms moving around. It's not like you can normally get a live feed of that sort of thing anywhere.
All of a sudden Minda is floating next to me and talking about how lovely the view was. It kind of startled me. I asked her if she was on a break or lunch and she said her shift was over. Since I looked confused, she said ours wasn't the only call center and that there's a big one on a planet called Pathilon.
She then asked me to pull up my sleeve so she could see my arm. I did that and she asked if she could touch it. I told her I guessed and she ran her hand over my arm and giggled and asked me to pull up my "pant" leg. She was making me nervous so I asked why. She said she'd never seen my kind in person and she wanted to know if I were truly as hairless as the people she saw on cable. I shrugged and pulled up a leg on the leggings to humor her. She giggles some more, then starts running her hand over my calf. The hand goes higher and I tell her to quit. Thankfully, she does, and she pulls her hand away, too.
One thing I could say for her is she was more respectful of boundaries than Sigma. That being said, she still had no tact. The moment she stops touching me, she asks to see my privates. I told her no and asked what made her think I'd even want to do that. Her response is that the people on cable did that sort of thing all the time, and she just wanted to see for herself that mine wasn't bifurcated like Abreya males. I asked her to change the subject.
She told me she'd never met a human before and was surprised that I wasn't a sex fiend like the people she saw in various programs. I told her she watches too much cable, and that seemed to quiet her for a moment, but then she asked if this were some sort of game and the sex came later. I told her no, I was serious, and told her to stop talking about it.
She asked me if I liked men, and I said no. She apologized for bringing up the subject again, but then asked me if I were a Puebuku. I asked her what that was and she said someone belonging to a religious order that takes a vow never to have sex.
I told her that pretty well describes me, but the right girl could change my mind, provided we share the same values and are married.
Her response? "You're an interesting person." And that's it.
Okay. I thought about it a minute, and decided I was grateful for such a normal, non-aggressive response.
We stared out the window quietly for a few minutes, then Minda asked if I'd ever heard of "Roalogi." I said I had not, so she took me to a computer and showed me a weird game. It's kind of hard to explain it, but it was kind of a shooting game. Shooting isn't quite the right word to describe it, since you don't use guns or bullets or laser beams, but it had projectiles of some sort, and you kind of made the projectile roll down a pipe inside a hole in your target. It was oddly addictive, and had really realistic graphics, though admittedly I didn't have those particular objects available for me to compare it to. I played this for a good hour or so. It was complicated, but Minda showed me how to operate everything.
We took turns playing the game, and as we did, she taught me some more about her language, some of the odd expressions and other nuances I couldn't pick up from a training module.
And cuss words, too. As my usual habit was to cuss at a game when it's too difficult, it rubbed off or something, and I heard her cussing, and she was telling me about her culture's curse words. I hope this doesn't ruin my customer service.
The game was hard to figure out, and it didn't have a plot, but after practicing for a few minutes, I at least could keep pace with it.
I guess she was somewhat impressed at my quick reflexes, because she asked me if I'd ever played the game before and what games I normally played.
I told her some things that were similar, and that video games are really a vice I keep trying to wean myself off of.
I started to get tired, so I went down to the sleeping quarters.
The uniform wasn't the most comfortable thing in the world, but I decided to keep it on for modesty and attempt to lay down on a bed.
She'd told me that the jellyfish things were beds, and how to use them, but used to laying on them. For one thing, instead of blankets, there were these flaps of translucent skin stuff. There were also tentacle things hanging off it, and you were supposed to sort of stick them together with its own secretions and you'd use that to keep yourself from drifting around the room when you slept.
I tried it, but I just laid there for a long time, tossing and turning and trying not to think about things that stressed me or kept me awake. I don't know when I fell asleep, but I somehow managed to eventually.
I ended up just floating in front of the window, staring at Jupiter. It was very surreal to look at the moons slowly orbiting the place, and see the clouds and storms moving around. It's not like you can normally get a live feed of that sort of thing anywhere.
All of a sudden Minda is floating next to me and talking about how lovely the view was. It kind of startled me. I asked her if she was on a break or lunch and she said her shift was over. Since I looked confused, she said ours wasn't the only call center and that there's a big one on a planet called Pathilon.
She then asked me to pull up my sleeve so she could see my arm. I did that and she asked if she could touch it. I told her I guessed and she ran her hand over my arm and giggled and asked me to pull up my "pant" leg. She was making me nervous so I asked why. She said she'd never seen my kind in person and she wanted to know if I were truly as hairless as the people she saw on cable. I shrugged and pulled up a leg on the leggings to humor her. She giggles some more, then starts running her hand over my calf. The hand goes higher and I tell her to quit. Thankfully, she does, and she pulls her hand away, too.
One thing I could say for her is she was more respectful of boundaries than Sigma. That being said, she still had no tact. The moment she stops touching me, she asks to see my privates. I told her no and asked what made her think I'd even want to do that. Her response is that the people on cable did that sort of thing all the time, and she just wanted to see for herself that mine wasn't bifurcated like Abreya males. I asked her to change the subject.
She told me she'd never met a human before and was surprised that I wasn't a sex fiend like the people she saw in various programs. I told her she watches too much cable, and that seemed to quiet her for a moment, but then she asked if this were some sort of game and the sex came later. I told her no, I was serious, and told her to stop talking about it.
She asked me if I liked men, and I said no. She apologized for bringing up the subject again, but then asked me if I were a Puebuku. I asked her what that was and she said someone belonging to a religious order that takes a vow never to have sex.
I told her that pretty well describes me, but the right girl could change my mind, provided we share the same values and are married.
Her response? "You're an interesting person." And that's it.
Okay. I thought about it a minute, and decided I was grateful for such a normal, non-aggressive response.
We stared out the window quietly for a few minutes, then Minda asked if I'd ever heard of "Roalogi." I said I had not, so she took me to a computer and showed me a weird game. It's kind of hard to explain it, but it was kind of a shooting game. Shooting isn't quite the right word to describe it, since you don't use guns or bullets or laser beams, but it had projectiles of some sort, and you kind of made the projectile roll down a pipe inside a hole in your target. It was oddly addictive, and had really realistic graphics, though admittedly I didn't have those particular objects available for me to compare it to. I played this for a good hour or so. It was complicated, but Minda showed me how to operate everything.
We took turns playing the game, and as we did, she taught me some more about her language, some of the odd expressions and other nuances I couldn't pick up from a training module.
And cuss words, too. As my usual habit was to cuss at a game when it's too difficult, it rubbed off or something, and I heard her cussing, and she was telling me about her culture's curse words. I hope this doesn't ruin my customer service.
The game was hard to figure out, and it didn't have a plot, but after practicing for a few minutes, I at least could keep pace with it.
I guess she was somewhat impressed at my quick reflexes, because she asked me if I'd ever played the game before and what games I normally played.
I told her some things that were similar, and that video games are really a vice I keep trying to wean myself off of.
I started to get tired, so I went down to the sleeping quarters.
The uniform wasn't the most comfortable thing in the world, but I decided to keep it on for modesty and attempt to lay down on a bed.
She'd told me that the jellyfish things were beds, and how to use them, but used to laying on them. For one thing, instead of blankets, there were these flaps of translucent skin stuff. There were also tentacle things hanging off it, and you were supposed to sort of stick them together with its own secretions and you'd use that to keep yourself from drifting around the room when you slept.
I tried it, but I just laid there for a long time, tossing and turning and trying not to think about things that stressed me or kept me awake. I don't know when I fell asleep, but I somehow managed to eventually.
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