Art tip

 If you wrinkle your paper trying to erase something, first of all, the paper is too thin. But you can still save it. If you get a burnisher or a bone folder or a cap of a marker or pen, carefully smooth out the wrinkles on one side, making sure the back end rests on a clean surface. Turn the paper over and smooth out the back. This should hopefully restore the paper for use again instead of being something to throw away.

Art supplies

 It turns out that those yellow binder dividers from the school supply aisle has a thicker consistency than the cheap art paper in sketchbooks that they sell in grocery stores.  It's yellow, but it holds ink and markers better than the sketchbook.

For that matter, the high quality poundage they use on all that junk you get in the mail is better than those sketchbooks. Those spaces that the bulk mailer "intentionally left blank" can be used as premium art surface.

Great song idea

 Why does $#!# fall down from the sky, every time, you walk by? Just like me, you're too clumsy, la la la

Veetle shop

 I tried calling the print shop next to Fric N Frac a few times for a job.  Or maybe it was Gemaco? Anyway, a guy with a Yiddish accent told me "We're just a veedle shop." 

Veedle shop, veedle shop of horrors, veedle shop veedle shop of terrors oh oh oh oh no

Crazy people assignments

 Assignment 613: Always wear long flowing garments and long neckties while cooking over a hot stove. It adds to the fun.

Assignment 614: Print out a checklist of locking up information, including alarm passwords, and place it somewhere easy to find when you leave on that vacation. Like, for example, on the outside of your front door.

Assignment 615: Always drive around with a full can of gasoline, propane, kerosene, paint thinner and fireworks in your trunk, especially on the fourth of July. It will be spectacular when you get rear ended.

Assignment 594: Invite everyone in the neighborhood to your house for a party...to scrub your patio furniture, dust your house, do your dishes and clean the floors. It'll be fun. No refreshments or anything, just them, cleaning your house.

Assignment 595: Whenever you drive somewhere, and you know for a fact that a street should cut through to a certain area, but instead you get lost, make note of that street. Take a special trip to that particular intersection with a bullhorn, condemning it in the name of God for not going in the direction you want it to. Declare that the entire street will be cast down into hell for misdirecting you, even if there are people living there, and employees working in a McDonald's on the corner.

Assignment 596: Adding short and curlies to anything makes it sell better.

Assignment 597: Gather all your family heirlooms and valuables together in one place and urinate all over them.

Assignment 598: When driving, make sure you avoid hitting children. Instead aim for their toys, crunching their little dolls, sports equipment and remote control cars beneath your wheels.

Assignment 599: Produce a line of lingerie that has storage pockets for cookies, muffins and Twinkies.

One thing I suspect

 I am now seriously wondering about something: When scammers are unable to successfully hack your account, do they get revenge by reporting you to the Facebook police? It would make a lot of sense, explaining why the flagged post is inoffensive, and why Facebook is hesitant to explain. The scammer may have lied and said you were bullying them or something.

I actually have a case for my suspicion: I got placed in Facebook jail within a week of receiving an email report saying that someone tried to log into my account with the wrong password.

Blood magic

 When fictional characters cut the palm of their hand to contribute blood to a spell, that's just TV laziness. It's easier to squeeze a blood pack when it's in your palm. My friend pointed out that this would be a really painful method, and it wouldn't heal easily.