High School Terra Story for the Sega Saturn: A Review

The packaging of this game says "You Will Find True Love," but it seems the only true love you will find in this piece of rhubbish is the eject button. First of all, this game is completely in Japanese, which already takes away some of the fun factor. I played it at my friend's house, and somehow I got addicted to trying to figure out how the game operates, how to get further and accomplish goals. I had no idea it was "hentai" until I tried to search for it on the web some time later. Then my friend gave the game to me, along with a Sears television that has no headphone jack and no way of connecting with my computer for good screen grabs, even if I knew how to do that. I copied some of my screen grabs from the web. Even though I don't know what the hell they're saying, I've figured out enough to be nauseated. They say games like this are good if you want a game where you can play and smoke at the same time, but you'll end up going through five cartons before you actually get anywhere in this one, and frankly, it's just not that entertaining.

Gardenia Comics [Part 134]

"I'll be home for Christmas...in October"

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Gardenia Comics [Part 133]

"Dry Bar"

The panda's shirt needs a design! What should be on the shirt? Suggestions wanted!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 132]

"Minibar"

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Gardenia Comics [Part 131]

"Inefficient Logistics"

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Ewpiglop Star Cruiser

Often confused with a galaxy by Earth cameras, this shuttle was moving very close to the Hubble Space Telescope. The Ewpiglop Star Cruiser features a specially designed pair of antimatter propulsion units positioned on large rotating arms (resembles "wings" of gas and dust around the celestial object).
No, actually, it's...
Little Nemo's Bed
On a direct path to the Hubble Space Telescope, Nemo's four poster bed blasts through space, leaving a wake of gaseous looking streamers.
Or...
WHERE GOD PLUGS IN HIS TOASTER.
Or..
I see a face in this galaxy. Maybe it's haunted? Or maybe Hubble is haunted? Or it could be...
SCENE FROM THE TWILIGHT ZONE.

Gardenia Comics [Part 130]

"Scott's Assistant"

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It's a Double Bubble Day

Lyrics to Double Bubble Day by Possible Oscar

I find a nickel, on the sidewalk.
Feel a trickle, of sunshine on me.
A street rat says good morning.
I can hear the pigeons sing.
It's a double bubble day...I'm moving rain boat fall on me today
It's a double bubble day...Everything is going my way hey
Buy a paper, friendly vendor
Get coffee, from the coffee man
Watch the swirls of milk go round
Watch the squirrels in their playground
It's a double bubble day...Even a car alarm sounds good to me today
It's a double bubble day...Everything is going my way hey
I spin myself around and fall on the concrete, A little ant walks by, he helps me to my feet
Alligator from the sewer
Pops her head out, and says blimey
Please come down and have some tea
I've got free cable TV
And it turns out she likes baseball
So we go up to the stadium
Sit among the spectators
Special section for gators
It's a double bubble day
From the speakers I hear the monkeys play
It's a double bubble day
Everything is going my way hey

Gardenia Comics [Part 129]

"Blue Bloods Tire Easy"

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Gardenia Comics [Part 128]

Unexpected help!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 127]

"Sniffing Ozzy's butt"

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Gardenia Comics [Part 126]

A surprise visit!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 125]

Random silly things!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 124]

Doggy Demon flies to the rescue!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 123]

The Hellevator: A secret of the Doggy Demon Mansion!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 122]

The Conference Call:
Doggy Demon and his wife Karen have a chat with Cupcake about their dying friend!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 121]

"Doggie Demon: The Interview!"
Cupcake the bird has her first talk with the famous mumbling rock star!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 120]

"You owe me"
Tensions brew as phone contact with the rock star continues!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 119]

A very important call!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 118]

"Waking in a strange bed"

Cupcake finds herself in a most unpleasant bed!

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Gardenia Comics [Part 117]

"Me and My Dianoga"
Kabby the cat snuggles with her pet Dianoga.

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Gardenia Comics [Part 116]

"Give up"
Is all hope lost? Will the two ever meet Doggy Demon?

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Gardenia Comics [Part 115]

"Crank it up"
Cupcake and Kabby are at each other's throats as they await a phone call from rock star Doggie Demon.

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Grandview

Ruskin center is an interesting place to drive past. One time I saw a guy washing his horse at the car wash. We used to have a Joe's restaurant around there somewhere, but I think it's gone. At one point there was a "Gull Stream Restaurant" in its place, where I suspect they had crappy fish, but I think that's gone, too.
Past that is Ruskin Highschool. They have a tornado memorial out on the corner intersection, but nobody can read the small print on the plaque, so it's kind of dumb. I guess there's people's names on it or something.
The Family Dollar on Blue Ridge just got a new sign, one that's really big.
Bannister is a ghost town. The mall is gone, Walmart Hypermart is gone, Toys R' Us is gone, Babies R' Us is gone, Best Buy is gone, Computer Renaissance and the tire store is gone, Hobby Lobby and Luby's is gone, I think even the Christian Bookstore is gone. We don't have the Truman Corners theater, we don't have jack. They have recycling in the Hypermart parking lot
Builder's Square has been shut down, and it seems a church bought the property. The signs are painted over and there's a big cross over the main sign. I can't imagine what they can do with all that room. A church doesn't need nearly that much room. I'm pretty sure they've folded.
They're redoing the Bannister bridge in front of the little league ball park they have a few blocks from the old IRS complex. Guys are walking around on rebar. Lots of orange cones, like the one that caused my Toyota Echo to be demolished.
The gas station at Holmes and Bannister used to be good, but now it's some crappy Presto store with a Liquor store connected to it.
Trabon Printing is past the gas station. They're weird because there's a big sign, but there's a bunch of trees and stuff in the way, and the pavement looks like crap, so you think they're out of business until you drive up the drive approach and go into the little aclove around the corner. They asked me to come in to interview twice.
There's a synogogue on Wornall. I always drive by it, and have thought about dropping in to see what a service is like, but I'm usually hanging out with my friend on Saturdays, so it never works out. I've always wondered what they do in there.

Gardenia Comics [Part 114]

"Waiting by the phone"
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Gardenia Comics [Part 113]

"Candid Camera"
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Why I'm reviewing Avatar fanfiction

Before reviewing tons of Avatar fanfiction, I must preface this with an explanation.
In 2006, I finished writing a novel about people with tails who lived in trees. I had been working on it for three years beforehand. Imagine my annoyance at seeing a movie about the same premise appear on screens in 2009. So there are differences between James Cameron's work and mine, such as how my non-blue characters lack fiber optic hair and are not anything like Indians. You can read my novel at http://mogwai_toejam.tripod.com/Earthstars.html. So maybe it's not as exciting as the Marines shooting at blue people throwing spears, and I plan to do an extensive rewrite once I've gotten all my alternate plots identified. It's just a shame that James Cameron effectively stole the soul out of my ideas before I got a chance to share them with the world.
In the process of reviewing all these works of fanfiction, I hope to gain some reflective insight into my work, and be able to modify my story so that it no longer resembles Avatar. By reading the worst of them, I hope to unlock that secret part of my brain that James Cameron cannot penetrate with his mind reading rays, and find whatever remains of the soul he sucked out.
If you think this sounds crazy, the other theory is even crazier. Did someone read my screenplay at Zoetrope.com and rip it off? Was James Cameron lying when he said he was writing the screenplay right after he got done with Terminator? My lawsuit wouldn't stand a snowball's chance in hell, like that Chinese guy that tried to sue him. I still want a copy of that book, the Tale of Blue Crows, and that book that Canadian wrote. I can find neither one online, which is truly a shame. All you can find are tons of news articles about it.

Gardenia Comics [Part 112]

"Candid Camera"
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Gardenia Comics [Part 111]

"Hard work"
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Gardenia Comics [Part 110]

"Fan Mail"
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Doggy Demon and his wife, Karen, at home.

Gardenia Comics [Part 109]

"What Lies Beneath"
(Poster Art Credit: Daniel Wagner)

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Gardenia Comics [Part 108]

"Soap"

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Gardenia Comics [Part 107]

"An impossible task" (Poster Art Credit: Daniel Wagner)

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Gardenia Comics [Part 106]

"Buti Licious"
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Gardenia Comics [Part 105]

"Deep Thoughts"
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Gardenia Comics [Part 104]

"Filler"
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Gardenia Comics [Part 103]

"Grimace Tries Comedy"
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Gardenia Comics [Part 102]

"Muttonchop talks politics"
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Gardenia Comics [Part 101]

"Mexican squirrel referral bonus"
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Gardenia Comics [Part 100]

"Creepy Kabby"
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3D optical art!

Gardenia Comics [Part 99]

"GSI: Gas Scene Investigation"
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Gardenia Comics [Part 98]

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Close Encounters: A Case Against

Shocking new proof!

Click the image to read the article!

Gardenia Comics [Part 97]

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Gardenia Comics [Part 96]

"Dating a Moslem"

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